moody

I'm in a mood
well... multiple moods actually.



I wrote and published the rental ad for our home
...that was hard

I MISS my home.

I am tired of living in someone elses basement
...with little windows
rough carpet
and shared beds

I wish it was time to start establishing a new home
...with our things.

It's snowing here
...which we love.

But fall seems to have passed us by
...without a beautiful show of leaves
and I miss that.

I am tired of wearing the same few outfits over and over again
...wish I had my whole closet here.

I am not feeling very {happy} with myself
...as I've gained 10lbs. since being here.
too many treats...too easy access

I am craving a good thrift store trip
...the ones here are less than desirable.

I went to a babyshower and held a newborn
...and didn't have baby fever
...for the first time ever!

I AM loving homeschool
...but it does leave less time for me

My husband is working hard
...but it is not bringing in money

The boys love it here
...but they miss there home, friends and things too.

I miss my family
...this is the longest I've ever gone without seeing my mom

I REALLY miss my best friend
...really REALLY a lot!

I am sure we are following Gods plan
...but it is still hard.

I have a couple new friends here
...and they make me smile.

We're starting a Mom's group
...and that makes me excited!

I'm tired of feeling like I have to keep {our} space perfectly clean
...because it's not really ours.

I'm worn out because the girls aren't sleeping well
...we finally were able to buy a crib hoping that will help

I have been planning {in my head} a trip home for the holidays
...but we may not be able to afford it
...and that makes me really sad.

I almost forget what it was like when we had money
...this is humbling

I miss my black and white tile floors so bad it almost hurts.

I ache for my washer and dryer like crazy.

I miss the sun shining through our big windows
...more and more now that we're in the basement.

I love HOME
...and I love the farm.

I wish {MY} house was on the farm.

I let it get my down too much
...it's only a house
...it's only things

I've been wondering why it seems easy for some
...and not for us?

That's not really a question I should ponder
...because I don't really know.

I'm wondering who I bless
...what am I really doing for God

too many thoughts wondering through my head
only some of them shared here.

now don't get me wrong
I'm not depressed and crying
I'm just unsettled
a little sad
a little lonely
but I still smile
and find all the enjoyment I can.

now that I've shared my heart
...with more people than I can wrap my mind around
...please be nice.