Do you have that magic mark that hits each day when you are just DONE. That energized, happy, optimistic mom is gone. She’s gone somewhere deep inside not to return until tomorrow. Mine is 6:30pm I can go-go-go all day and I usually accomplish a lot. I keep the house up, the kids fed, clothed, happy. We play, we talk, we laugh, we smile. But after 6:30pm I become this other person who is tired, worn, emotionless and unenthused about the rest of the day. It’s not fair! Why does everyone during the day get the best of me but my husband gets the worst when he gets home. That is not what I want for him, for me, for us.
Well I better get off and finish the day with all I have left. I wish the kitchen was clean, the kids were washed and ready for bed, the giggle bugs settled, the books read and the lights off. I wish. But what I wish more is I could find a way to get through the evenings with M,E the real me, the me everyone gets during the day.
Does this happen to anyone else? What do you do? Anything work for you?
Peace out
We just talked about this in my Bible Study and during playgroup today! YOU are not alone!
ReplyDeleteOne thing that stuck out to me is: we have a choice as to whether we want to love and love on our husbands, and we can ask God to give us the desire to give our hubbies the attention and support they need, even after the kids are in bed! I know I really need to work on that... REALLY.
P.S> What day or days can you get together next week?
Yours is 6:30? That's impressive. I can only hold out until about 5:30:)
ReplyDeleteThanks for being honest! It's so refreshing! (I mean, not that you aren't usually honest...I don't want that to come across wrong...but it's just nice to read your post. That's all I meant!)
I only have two and I've had it by noon! then I get to go to work from 6pm - 12am.
ReplyDeleteMy husband doesn't get to see me good or bad :-(
Being a mom is hard.
Keep your chin up. :-)
Oh, yes, definitely. Except neither me -- neither the early, happy, cheerful me nor the later, grouchy, crabby me -- can keep the house clean. ;)
ReplyDeleteOh yeah, mine is anywhere from 6-7. One thing that has really helped is my husband gets them in the bath (they take a bath together every night) and gets their jammies out and the bedroom ready. Then I have my 20-30 minutes of quiet (he even takes the baby upstairs to hang out with them) and a little re-charge. When it's time to get out of the bath, I get the call and I'm back on duty getting everyone settled and asleep. That little break seems to be my power nap of sorts...and while I'm getting the kiddos asleep, hubby is downstairs with just the baby and is having his own decompress time. It works!
ReplyDeleteMusic saves lives. I know I don't need to tell YOU this considering a love of music seems to run in our family. But I find myself needing it more and more if even for a few songs.
ReplyDeleteEspecially when every day is typically the same and routine, you get into a rut sometimes. Believe me, every day on Sheppard Air Force Base is the exact same, and it wears me down. Although my mark usually hits after we get home from school around midnight or later.
Besides music, it helps to take on the days in segments, or even the weeks. For example I stay motivated when I think about getting home from school or the weekend coming up (or me getting the heck outta here in 5 weeks). Either way, find positives in your day. They are a lot easier to find if we look for them. Now thats not saying getting to raise 4 amazing boys every day isn't positive, because that is beyond impressive in my eyes.
You guys always say how proud you are of me for what I'm doing and all that. Well I am proud of my big sister for what she does day in and day out. I'll ALWAYS look up to you (even if you were a mean babysitter back in the day haha).
Stay motivated, we all get worn out from time to time. I hope these words can help to give you somewhat of a boost. And keep ya head up! Maybe one day you'll see me do a fly by ;)
Oh yeah. I get that. Except mine is usually right before nap time in the afternoon. I usually am able to recharge during their nap and make it to bedtime ok.
ReplyDeleteIt is their energy and volume levels that get me. It is just hard for me to maintain that all day. And so many people tell me that girls are harder to raise than boys. The whole time I'm thinking, "Yeah, right!". I think people who say that do not have multiple boys or boys close in age. I don't know. It probably depends on the kids, but my sister's girls are cake! Cake, I tell you!
Anyway, hang in there. We are all right there with ya on this one.
Oh yes. Ooooooh Yes.
ReplyDeleteNice to know I'm not the only one that goes through this! I find it especially hard some days to separate "business partner hubby" with "my best friend hubby" on those days when work is crazy hectic.
ReplyDeleteI haven't been posting to my blog lately, due to the old rule, "don't say anything if you can't say something nice." It's been really hard to police my actions lately and be purposefully nice and warm to my family. I hope this passes soon, it's not like me!
Hang in there, maybe it's a winter thing. We've all been cooped up inside lately with the extreme cold weather here in the Midwest.
I have the same issue. I feel like my husband get the grumpy me always. We occasionally will take a morning off or go into work late to have breakfast together. We drop Bubbie off at daycare and go to a nice restaurant. We get to enjoy a meal together and enjoy each other at our best.
ReplyDeleteHang in there, spring is around the corner. The spring always helps lift the winter blahs.
Mine is usually around 4:00 p.m. I'm different though once the hubs comes home I'm happy as can be. Before he gets home is a different story. I get back my energy as soon as he walks through the door- it's like a HUGE sigh of relief!
ReplyDeleteI left a little something for you at my blog! :)
ReplyDeleteThis does happen to me too. It's usually around 6 or 6:30 for me also and my husband gets home around 7. Once he walks in I am ususally okay, but I need him to relieve me of at least one child and he wants to eat dinner. I don't usually perk back up until the kids go to bed so I try to get them there as early as possible, but my oldest wants all the daddy time he can get. Sometimes it seems like there is no balance, doesn't it? You have twice as many kids as I do, so I think you are doing pretty well. My best suggestion is to just try to find some time for yourself between the time the kids go to bed and you hit the sack because that is essential for me.
ReplyDeleteI laughed when I read this post - I informed Daniel about a year ago that after 7 pm I stopped being a good mama. That was the cut off. After 7 it's all downhill. My focus is getting those beautiful, wonderful children INTO BED. I hate feeling that way, but it is so reality - long, very busy days make for a tired mama. I need about an hour, sometimes more, to recharge and then I'm fine and I can focus on Daniel.
ReplyDeleteI am happy to know someone else experiences this as well.
-Andrea
I'm always shot by 8 pm right when we are putting the kids to bed and I'm forcing myself to read books and often discover I am just going through the book without really "reading" it. Ever done that before? Words just coming out of my mouth. It's so hard not to feel burnt by the end of the day. A cup of tea before I head off to bed with the hubby usually gives me a little energy to at least have an hour or two with him. Trust me, you are not alone!
ReplyDeleteAlso, I love your recipes. Keep them coming. I am a recipe junkie and love to try new things.
IT's refreshing to hear you say this because I am the same way. Be thankful your little one's get the best of you, my best goes to the people I work with and what little is left goes to my little boy after preschool and my hubby. I'm so tired when it's time to spend time with them...I haven't figured it out yet...I will let you know when I do!
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